Things I wish allistics would remember about autistic people


Social skills can be a foreign language to us: We can learn it, but what comes natural to you doesn’t come natural to us. Don’t call us rude if we prefer to be alone, don’t laugh at our social struggles, we’re trying, and any ableist reaction isn’t going to help us

What you can tolerate may be intolerable to us: We process things differently. We often can’t cope with certain sounds, too much visual information can drive us into overload. Certain textures can also be intolerable. We’re not exaggerating if we say something is too loud, we’re not lying if we can’t cope in a busy area

Meltdowns are not tantrums, and we may need time to shutdown: I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, meltdowns are not tantrums, we are not doing it intentionally. We are doing it as a fight-or-flight response. And likewise for shutdowns, don’t question if we go non-verbal, and please understand we may need time alone

Stimming is generally a coping mechanism: This is a trait commonly mocked by ableists. We use stimming as a way of coping. It may look weird to you, but we do it for many reasons. To keep us focused, to calm us down when feeling overloaded, to express emotion

Special interests aren’t weird or dangerous: If I had a penny for every time an allistic person implied my special interest was unhealthy and should be discouraged, I’d have quite a lot of pennies. It’s only weird to you because you don’t understand the joy it gives us. And you may worry that infodumping about one topic could discourage people from talking to us. I can’t speak for all autistic people on this, but I for one would rather be friends with someone who accepts my special interests, at least then I’m being myself

you know the thing where while going from one room to another has you forget what the fuck you were going there for? well clapping while walking has worked as a brainhack to help me get over that… like… it got really bad bc im constantly tired but if i just clap as i walk i can focus on what my last thought was and remember what i was doing?

stimming is just… such a huge boon to day-to-day functioning


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